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18 February 2007 @ 02:04 am
 
Title: Like Butterflies Pinned To Pages.
Author: rev.
Fandom: Criminal Minds.
10_per_genre: Table 9: Challenge: 6. Righting a wrong.
Pairing: JJ/Reid.
Rated: Teen.
Summary: And he realizes that despite how much his life has fractured since Tobias, no matter how hard it gets to function sometimes; the idea that she needs him even a little helps more than he can express.
Author’s Note: It’s kind of fractured but it’s supposed to be that way.


La cienega just smiles, says I’ll see you around


Sometimes, when he’s not paying attention to what’s going around him, he finds himself watching her. No one else sees it, the quiet way JJ has shrunk back into herself, but he notices. He notices and he hears himself in his head telling her they needed to split up.

“It’s not her fault,” is what he told Morgan “It was my idea to split up.”

Morgan tried to tell him that he doesn’t blame JJ for what happened but Reid knows him better.

“What happened to me and what happened to her. It’s my fault.”

It’s my fault, he says time and time again in his head. It doesn’t help and he can’t seem to make himself say it to the person who needs to hear the most but he says it. He says it and hopes she hates him, hopes that in some part of her head, she realizes what he’s done to her. He took away the fearless JJ and left behind the JJ that winces when dogs bark.

He wants her to hate him. She doesn’t.

JJ still smiles at him the way she used to and still calls him Spence. She still tells him things about her life. He remembers when he was in the hospital she came to see him after the others had left.

“My mother gave me this when I was in a car accident,” she had said handing him a shadowboxed butterfly “I was ten and she told me that anytime I was feeling stir crazy, to look at the butterfly and imagine I was outside.”

He keeps it on his desk and when he feels stir crazy, he looks at it, with its bright blue wings and thinks of her eyes.

He thinks she needs him; needs someone who understands even if he thinks a part of her feels guilty about needing him. She never asks for too much, she never really asks. She offers and he takes, he lets her be a shoulder to lean on and someone who listens. He talks and she listens, it isn’t much but it’s something little that he can give her. And he realizes that despite how much his life has fractured since Tobias, no matter how hard it gets to function sometimes; the idea that she needs him even a little helps more than he can express.
 
 
Current Mood: boredbored
Current Music: billie meyers - kiss the rain
 
 
 
sugarcult_ncis: nathensugarcult_ncis on February 18th, 2007 05:13 pm (UTC)
very very cute. i love it :)
kimi_kawaii: no waikimi_kawaii on February 18th, 2007 08:05 pm (UTC)
cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute! I loved it. It was really sad but so adorable at the same time.

I really like how you write Reid! ^_^ Although I think that JJ would feel guilty as well.
pulaski_casimir on February 19th, 2007 04:17 pm (UTC)
Awwww...

I love them.
And you!

this was adorable and fluffy and just awww.
the jen is in...ribbitjen23 on February 20th, 2007 12:24 pm (UTC)
aw...yay. kisses~jen
you could be my unintended love: film. (500) ll illusion is the first ofsweet_iolanthe on December 17th, 2009 04:35 pm (UTC)
aww. this was so lovely!